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Sunbeam/. 



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Sunbeams and 
Shadows 



BY 



CHARLOTTE PAU 




Cochrane Pul)lishing Company 

Tribune l^uikling 

New York 

1910 



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SUNBEAMS AND SHADOWS 



Sunbeams and Shadows 



TO NATURE. 



Wrapt in the silence of oblivion, 

']Mid Nature's verdant bowers I love to dwell, 
As with the ears of mine all-eager soul 

I listen to her voice of mystic spell. 

How sweet the murm'ring of her gentle voice 
As whispering thro' some sylvan nook she comes. 

How beautiful her warblings in the air! 

How quaint when in the insect world she hums ! 

Sometimes 1 find lier sleeping 'neath some ledge, 
]\[oss for her pillow, thistle-down her quilt. 

Pure azure beameth forth from those mild eyes 
And to disturb her seems to me a guilt. 

At other times from some moss-covered rock 
I hear soft music, like fair Sappho's voice, 

As chimings of a Ijell, through agate clefts 

Flow on like pearls, or sparkling brilliants choice. 

Or should I chance at Eventide to stroll 
Beside the waters of yon sil'very lake, 

I see her o'er the rippling wavelets dance 
And in the dazzling pantomine partake. 

Nature ! If an earthy god I chose, 

It would be thee that I should then desire , 

For thou alone canst give to me the cnarms 
Which fill my soul as with Promethean fire. 



I wonder not that Flora in her love 

Should crown thee with the purest of her gems 
P^or thou, more fair than Egypt's fairest queen, 

Art worthy of her richest diadems. 



Grant that when I, in sleep, shall w^ait the call 
Of thy Creator with a reverent dread, 

Thy charms around my resting place, aloai 
Shall mark the tomb of thy young lover, dcfid. 



SONNET. 

(To the face of the Madonna.) 



Seraphic pattern to all womanhood, 
So beautiful in thine all-perfect grace. 
Sublime expression, and sweet, placid face. 
In all so grandly beautiful and good. 
Forever blest in thy pure motherhood. 
In those uplifted eyes one still may trace 
The well depicted sorrow for thy race, 
Whicli none but God have fully understood. 
Grand countenance, tho' earthly, yet divine. 
Telling, in thine all-silent ecstasy, 
Thy holy love, which yet undinmed by time 
In adoration of the Deity, 
Pours forth the music of thy soul sublime, 
Which ne'er shall cease thro' all Eternity. 

8 



ASK THINE HEART. 

Go ask thine heart when all is still 
The cause of this its restless pain— 

This longing for a freer state, 
For time when we may meet again. 



Search deep within each sacred aisle 
Till thou shalt find the relic hid, 

And then with reverence, pure and meet, 
Do that which thine own truths shall l)id. 



Make not unto thyself a god; 

From vain and human passions flee. 
Love not an object which is not 

Reflection of the Deity. 



In all seek first to know thyself, 

And see thy God in all things fair, 

Rememb'ring that where He is not 
Nothing is pure, or good, or rare. 



Go ask thine heart, and then return 
To tell the theme of thy request, 

Or bury with the holocaust 

Thy love; leave me alone to rest. 



Ask thine own heart with sacred awe 
If thy great love is pure and free; 

If not, then think of me as dead 
Till wakened in Eternity. 

9 



AN APRIL TEAR. 

A dainty mountain floweret sweet, 
A little maiden fair and neat, 

Down by the redwood tree. 
Time, afternoon, an April day. 
Upon a mossy bank lie lay. 

While she gazed o'er the lee. 

Clear notes of linnet in the air, 

A pure delight reigned everywhere ; 

Our lovers silent dreamed. 
But had their thoughts been mirrored then, 
In the fair tableau of the glen, 

A heaven it would have seemed. 

A tender loving smile arose 
Of confidence, and sweet repose 

Opon his manly face. 
A gentle blush, a drooping head: 
She murmured not; but sighed instead, 

For Love had gained her grace. 

Two eyes of sapphire hue upturned; 
Two orbs of brown with passion burned ; 

Their lips in silence pressed. 
A Hash as of some golden rays, 
A happy thought of future days, 

Her head lay on his breast. 

Once more their lips in union meet. 

The earth seems trembling 'neath her feet. 

Ah, timid damsel fair! 
A proud avowal — soft reply. 
They gaze upon the distant sky 

For all is beauty there. 

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He holds her hands, 
The cloudlets pass. 
A tear falls on the emerald grass 

As raindrop from above. 
Oh, solace which each heart should know, 
Inebriating rapture ! Lo 

Thine own sweet name is Love. 



TO SAINT AGNES. 

O sainted Agnes ! often have I sighed 

To dwell in sacred blessedness with thee. 
To gaze into thine heavenly lighted eyes 

And view tlierein Faith's holy mystery, 
Or from those blessed lips to learn the creed 

To which thou firmly stood, in Death's dread sight. 
To learn to suffer and to die for Him 

Who only can bestow Faith's mystic light 
And gird lis with befitting armor for tlie fight. 



Teach me, fair young Saint ! to tread each day 

The path where Patience, Purity and Love, 
In strict obedience to the Will of God, 

Thy footsteps follow to His throne above. 
Give me a portion of tliat sacred fire 

Which in the sight of torture quickening thee 
.'^nd gave thee grace a traitor's love to spurn, 

Shedding thy blood for Christ so willingly; 
Leaving Earth's soiled joys for blest Eternity. 

11 



NOEL. 

Ere darkness fades, burst forth, Day ! 
And chime, ye bells, the joyous lay ! 
Oh wing, ye messengers of Peace, 
From North to South, from West to East, 
And bid the AVorld to one fair shrine, 
O'er which the stars of Bethlehem shine. 

There rich and poor alike may kneel. 

The poor the richest joys may feel. 

To aged sire and infant fair 

Donate God 's blessings sweet and rare ; 

For down from Heaven God's love is come, 

Incarnate in His own loved Son. 

Then cease, ye struggling, weary heart, 
For one brief space let care depart, 
God's tender love and solace feel- 
On this, oh Happiest Day ! and kneel 
Before the Christchild's earthly throne, 
While joyful Alleluias tone. 

Let the glad warmth of Christian love 

Speed through the world as wings the dove. 

Oh, gentle Harbinger of Peace, 

Warm our chilled hearts, our Faith increase, 

While Heaven's bright choirs their anthems sing 

Let us the Saviour's advent ring. 

Nature, wake from out thy sleep ! 
And with us sacred vigil keep. 
Lend thy kind aid o'er land and sea, 
That all the world exultant be. 
From zone to zone let Nations sing 
"All glory to the New-born King." 

12 




"OER WHICH THE STARS OF BETHLEHEM SHINE." 



I DREAMED. 

As I stood at my latticed window, 

In far off, sunny Spain, 
I dreamed how I should meet him. 

]\Iy knight of royal fame. 
How his smiles would l)eam upon me, 

How sweetly I'd lireathe his name. 
His gracious and noble visage 

As Fancy mirrored it then ; 
Compared, I thouglit. to an angel's 

Rather than face of man ; 
But as I dreamed at my casement, 

A mist came floating by. 
And all that was left of my vision 

Was a tear-drop in mine eye. 

I dreamed once again as we wandered. 

My royal knight and I, 
In the grand old cathedral of Burgos, 

As the hour for Vespers drew nigh ; 
And I dreamed of that sacred union. 

Which would make me his hapi^y bi-ith 
Nor thought that the awful angel. Death, 

Was lingering near to his side. 
That night we parted as usual — 

On my brow his tender lips pressed; 
But ere the morning was dawning 

His loved face was still in death. 
Alas, for the dreams of my girlhood ! 

How quickly did they fly! 
The only fragrant remaining 

Was a tear-drop in mine eye. 

15 



E'en now, as I speed on Life's journey, 

I dream of him once again, 
And of Death, that shall soon unite us, 

After long years of grief and pain ; 
For though our hodies shall crumble 

'Neath the Earth's cold, heavy sod. 
The souls that are true in their loving 

Sliall unite in the Vision of God. 



OPALS. 



Reflections of hapi)y hours gone by, 

Of the ruby lip, or azure eye. 

And a face for which we ever sigh. 

Fond Youth's pure love in its fullest ])loom. 

Or tears which fall in the hidden gloom 

From hearts which break o'er some hollow tomb. 

The swelling thoughts of a wounded breast ; 
Remnants of sorrow now laid to rest ; 
Heartache, and memory, sad, distressed. 

Translucient vision of hidden peace; 

Hope in a Future — Heaven's release 

And solace and rest, which ne'er shall cease. 

The golden dew from the lily's cheek. 
The perfumed kiss of the roses deep. 
And our love, which may God in Heav'n keep! 

16 



A LULLABY. 



hush thee, my baby! 
The night winds are sighing; 
The birds and their nestlings 
Now sleep in their nests — 
The day is fast waning, 
The fair stars are shining. 
So hush thee, my baby, 
And peacefully rest. 



hush thee, my Darling; 
For I am still watching ; 
When sleeping or waking 

1 guard o'er thy nest. 

The dark clouds are gathering, 
Rain's tear-drops are scatt'rin^ 
But hush thee, my darling. 
And fearlessly rest. 



O hush thee, my baby! 
The angels are singing, 
They sweetly are calling 
Thy soul from its nest. 
Thy life is fast ebbing. 
My sad heart is breaking; 
But sleep on, my baby, 
And patiently rest. 

17 



hush thee, my loved one I 
heed not my weeping! 
The angels are numb 'ring 
Thy soul with the Blest. 
Thy form they are bearing, 
In mercy unerring, 
So hush thee, my loved one. 
And blessedly rest. 



MOONLIGHT. 

The powers of the gorgeous sun are spent 

And Night's gray shadows brilliant decked appear. 

While o'er the grand expanse of heaven all clear 
The silver lances of the moon are blent, 
Save where by floating atmosphere is rent 

The silvery flood of light. Some cloudlets near 

Will for a while make the scene look drear 
..4nd over all wierd ghostlike forms present. 

Watch how the creeping spectres fast advance 
As Luna, hidden by yon rising hill. 

Bids farewell to the dwellers of the vale. 
See how like pearly gems her beams enhance 
Her smiling beauty, as in stream or rill 

The charmed reflections of her face prevail. 

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MY JEWELS. 

The jewels I prefer are three, 

Tho' plentiful they seem to be 

To this fair world of ours. 

The first o'er Night's clouds always smile 

And in soft Evening's hours beguile 

My heart with radiancy; 

And as still Night puts on her veil 

The stars beam forth o'er hill and dale. 

E'en as they lantern me. 



The second dwell in grassy nooks 

Or scattered near some rippling brooks 

Exhale their fragrancy. 

They lead me on from tree to tree, 

As though I were some thrifty bee 

Searching sweet rarity — 

I love to linger where they dwell, 

As though entranced by mystic spell, 

When Nature's flow^ers I see. 



My third, tho' of a different kind, 

Resemble still the stars that shine. 

In their rare purity. 

The babes which nestle to the breast, 

Or sweetly in their cradles rest, 

Fair flowers seem to be. 

As their sweet cherub faces smile, 

Devoid of policy and guile, 

Eare jewels are to me. 

19 



EUREKA. 



Where the orange groves, with their fragrance rare, 

Slope towards the innr^nnring sea, 
Where the inocldng-bird tunes the midnight air; 
Where the fields are decked with eschscholtzias fair — 

There, there do I long to be. 



In the land of woodlands — 'neath sylvan dome, 

Of redwood, of oak and of fir; 
In the land where the deer at noonday roam, 
Where the branches waft back the ocean's moan 

And the leaves unceasing stir; 



Wliere the golden rays of the sun are blent. 

From Matins till Evensong's chime. 
Where the red and blue in union are sent 
O'er the pure white snows of Shasta's ascent, 
Weaving a banner sublime. 



"Eureka!" I cry, as on the bright shore 

Of fair California I rest. 
And as memory recalls those days of yore. 
When the great Columbus reached Salvador, 

I deem him scarcely more blest. 

20 




•NEATH SYLVAN DOME." 



SUMMER TWILIGHT. 
(Mendocino.) 



The evening "Angeliis" is rung, 

And God's fair earth seems hushed; 

Save for the chirping of the birds, 
Or crickets in the dust. 



The last red hues still tint the West, 
Hill, dale, and mountain o'er. 

The Evening star her fair light lends. 
Adding to beauty's store. 



The doleful dove 'mid pines still coos 
Her plaintive sighs of love; 

While man in balmy stillness rests 
And blankly looks above 



The murmuring wind is hushed and still. 

The zephyrs softly breathe. 
The croaking of the frogs is heard 

By brook and swamp and reed. 



Across the verdant meadows sweep 
The waves of tinted grain. 

The sheep are couched upon the hills 
Or wander o'er the plain. 

23 



The songsters seek their gentle mates 
Who guard their dainty nests, 

As Twilight o'er us casts her veil 
And bids the weary rest. 

Then o'er the hills the mist appears, 

From ocean wafted on. 
The quail in the underbrush 

Pipe their notes quaint and long. 

The rabbits from their ])urrows hie, 

To watch the moon appear ; 
The "King of Birds" on mountain crest 

Is perching free from fear. 

With tints of azure and of gold 

Dame Nature paints the sky; 
As Twilight in her calm, sweet voice. 

Sings "Rest." her lullaby. 



A REVERIE. 

There was a time when I could smiling roam 

And dream of happy days which were to come; 
But now Youth's brightest, fairest hopes are flown. 

And Life beats on as 'twere a muffled drum. 
In days gone by each bird and beast and flcfiver 

Awoke within me joyous dreams of love ; 
But now 'tis seeming dark M'ithin my bow'r. 

While chill autumnal clouds float on above 
And Life's concerto seems to be devoid of love. 

24 



Those days of girlhood now are left behind, 

Luxuriant tresses yield to silver threads, 
And Nature, who of old seemed wond'rous kind. 

Now looks askance as with some hidden dread. 
Fair were the visions of those happy days — 

Visions of grandeur, triumph and esteem; 
But now they lie, like scattered chaff or hay, 

Or fallen leaves athwart Life's flowing stream. 
Which in their silent language tell my shattered dream. 



That stream still flows, as when in days of yore 

The fragrant, blushing almond-blossoms fell ; 
Rut now the briny wreckage on the shore 

The sorrows of ingratitude may tell. 
E'en as the fallen blossoms in tlie Spring 

Are scattered by the gentle evening breeze. 
So Autumn leaves which, witlierod. fail to cling, 

Bespeak the pangs whicli separation leaves. 
Telling tbe story of a life from love un wreathed. 



E'en so the soul of man must onward wing 

Its flight beside Life's ever surging stream. 
And learn, with many a crucifying sting. 

That Life on earth owns not its brightest dream. 
Yes ! visions of this world must surely fade ; 

Our brightest hopes must vanish and decay; 
Our bodies in the silence of the grave 

jMust wait the vision of "Eternal Day," 
When God each sacrifice of love will then repay. 

25 



MY HEART. 



My heart was a ''Northern" heart, my Love, 
With its snow-clad crests and its icebergs wild, 

For the northern light was cold and chill 

And the rays of the "Southern" sun ne'er smiled. 



My heart was cold as a Winter's night. 

When the sleet and snow drift athwart the main. 

Like a storm-tossed ship in ocean deep, 

Its mainmast shattered, and sails rent in twain. 

My heart was like to a heart of stone 

In the veins of which flowed some hidden stream ; 
But it dormant lay for need of life. 

Till thy spirit wakened my soul's fond dream. 



My heart was a "Northern" heart, my Love, 
Till within its portals thine image gazed. 

Thy Warm breath hath melted the ice and snow. 
JNIy pulses vibrate 'neath its Southern rays. 

My heart is a "Southern" heart, my Love, 
But it feeleth now both gladness and pain. 

Gladness- — thy love so pure and so true. 

Pain — the days whicli pass till we meet again. 



]\Iy heart is a "Southern" heart, my Love, 

And though througli its veins flows the "Northern" 
hue 

It true shall stay to its "Southern" Love, 

Till it lifeless lies 'neath "The Gray and The Blue." 

26 



QUEEN OF WATERS. 

Grand Pacific ! 
"Wild! Magnific! 

Worlds of beauty in thee live, 
flighty Ocean 
What devotion 

Visions of thy o'randeur give ! 



O'er thy billows, 
Like green meadows, 

Skims the albatross at dawn. 
Star-light vision 
Sky's reflection, 

Decks thee when the day is gone. 



Near the borders 
Of thy waters 

California 's daughters stand. 
Sweet acacias 
Fair eschscholtzias 

Weaving in a golden band. 



Queen of waters, 
Dancing zephyrs 

From thy bosom kiss the foam. 
Wealth prolific, 
Powers terrific, 

'Neath thy placid mantle romri, 

29 



NOW AND THEN. 



The fields cast off their "Winter shroud; 

For it is Spring. 
Now all is bright save where some cloud 
Wings its swift flight across the dome of blue. 
The anthem of the songsters makes 

The forest ring. 
The music of the heart awakes, 
Then fades to cherished memories of you. 



The sad Arbutus calls to Heaven 

With her sweet breath ; 
Yet silence is the answer given ; 
Devotedness will win not love, but see 
Her rare fruits wither 'neath the smile 

Oh, cruel Death ! 
Of the sweet Daisy, and meanwhile 
Will bear alone her heartfelt agony. 



Within the garden of Life's way 

Three souls have met. 
And two may meet again some day. 
Noiv it is Spring — it will be Autumn then. 
Theirs the rich fruits of Summer hours. 

Hers but regret — 
The Winter's frost and blinding showers; 
Yet e'en through all her heart shall breathe "Amen!' 



30 



TO PAULINE. 
(A Very Poor German Peasant Child.) 

Oh, fair young child by God beatified, 
How wonderful thy love for Him doth seem; 
And when I gaze, as tho' in some fond dream 
Into thy sweet young face, so dignified, 
My mind and soul are deeply edified, 
I marvel not that Christ should only deem 
The souls that with a childlike spirit beam 

Most worthy, by Him, to be glorified. 
Poor child of man; yet rich in holy grace; 

A priceless pearl, so beautiful, so fair! 
Oh, may thine angel thy rough pathway trace 

Unto a resting-place, all free from care, 
And guide thee to thy loving Saviour's face. 

There to be numbered 'mid His jewels rare. 



31 



AkR 18 1912 



LIBRARY OF CONGRESS 

018 407 452 7 



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